Transcript of the 2007 Awards

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The following is a transcript of the 2007 Awards thread, written by Threm.


Solar: Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome to the 6th annual GCB Awards, I'll be your host for the evening. Well lets get this crap underway, i got some ladies in the dressing room waiting for me, don't wanna keep em waiting. Alright so anyway, to present the first award for Best Noob, here is last years winner, UnanimousPrime

  • An old man slowly makes his way to the podium.
  • The crowd grows impatient as the old man continues to slowly move towards the podium*
  • The old man collapses and dies*

Solar: Uhh...alright then....so ya *picks up envelope* anyway, the winner of the award for Best Noob is....*brrriiing brrriiing* Hey baby, whats up? right on, what are you wearing? oh damn girl, i like that. Nah i'm not busy, i'm on my way.

Luis: Don't worry guys, i'll take over! YAY! I love you all!!! The winner is Nate and the runner up is Theuberjedi. But you're all winners is my book! You guys are the best? Will you all be my friends? Check out these pictures of me!!!

  • Cock Fires*
  • Luis drops dead to the ground in a pile of semen*

Vornoff: And she was like owwwwwwwwww shut up luis!

  • Nate walks up onto the stage and is promptly slapped off the stage with a giant preroi CRM now*

Vornoff: BOOOM COCKSLAP

Liz: Hey big guy? wanna try that thing out on me? wink

Vornoff: It's my job.

Vornoff: Oh, ya worst noob is Adidas runner up is Theuberjedi.

  • Walks over to liz and deftly undresses her in one swift movement of his preroi CRM now, and proceeds to show her the horse love*
  • Escee beams down*

Escee: I just won the award for smartest user, again, how did i know? Cause i'm smarter then you. Oh, and meme is the runner up.

  • Escee beams away*
  • Dillo scurries out*

Dillo: Why did it take this long for me to be allowed to be the host? This is racist! RACIST! Keeping the black man down! Now if you crackers will shut up, i'm gonna annouce the winners for the next 2 awards. Why cause it's how i role!

Johnny_la_roo: No it's cause you're black and lazy!

  • Dillo pulls out a gun and shoots johnny in the face*

Dillo: Stereotype that biatch! Anyway, The winner for Most Enthusiastic and Most Optimistic is Threm, man this shizzle is rigged. Oh, ya, runners up Hero and April.

Dillo: See, you get a black man up here working it and things get done, not gonna get distracted like those other fools!

Dabest: Armadillo's are lame!

Dillo: Damn man *sniff*, that's just mean. *Runs off the stage crying black tears*

  • Escee beams down*

Escee: Just picking up my award for most annoying, see above. And didas is the runner up.

  • Escee beams away*

Dabest: Alright, so anyway, the next Award is for Most Dedicated and the winner is TPE, runner up is Threm.

Dabest: Moving right along, the winner for Most Creative is..

  • Linguine Swoops in and kills dabest with a giant noodle*

Linguine: PHILLIES SUCK!!!!! ahem, the winner is...Dillo, runner up is TPE.

Linguine: The next award is for most emo and the winner is...oh crap, it's 8:30, it's passed my bed time, i gotta go..sorry guys.

Panda: Alright, now that the children are gone to sleep *starts to strip*, so the winner is TPE, runner up is pdl. Now sit back and enjoy the show ladies.

Behnom: You bloody nancy, it's all blokes here!

Panda: What..really? what the...uh..i gotta go..

Behnom: Alright, so now that the poofter is gone, the winner of Biggest Pervert is Liz, with teh_tingulator as runner up.

  • Liz hobbles over, naked and dripping*

Liz: Phew, i, gimme a second to catch my breath....Oh gosh that was amazing. Alright, so while i'm here, i guess i'll annouce the winners for the next 2 awards, which are Coolest User and Most likely to be modded. The winner for both is Threm and runner up for both is Solar. Now um...back to it. Brad, present the next award k?

  • Whip Cracks*

Lilb: Well Brad is supposed to annouce the award for Most likely to be permabanned, but he is stuck in his seat, so while they get him out i'll handle his job. Anyway, so the winner is DrJawn, Adidas is the runner up.

Lilb: Anyway, moving right along, the next two awards are for Best Icon and Best Icon Maker and the winner for both is

  • CHOMP*

Alotofbs: MMMM tastes like feet. So, mm, anyway, mm, the winner for both is Dabest, runner up is Hero and TPE.

Alotofbs: So i've been noticing a trend that people are not lasting more then one award each as host...well, that's about to change. I'm 3 tons! Good luck making me move! HA!

  • Dies of major heart attack*

Mario2: Someone get a fork lift, this fatty is blocking me from presenting the next award! Man, that's a fatty. I mean just damn...fat! It's hard to look at...my gosh. Gah, anyway, Best Mod and Best Mod Colours. Winner is Luis for both and wsim is runner up on both.

Mgoblue: There he is officer! That's the one, he's the illegal alien here! Take him back to where he belongs!

  • Mario2 gets dragged away by officers*

Mario2: If i'm going down i'm taking you with me whore!

  • Throws a taco at mgoblue's vagina killing him instantly*
  • Pretty young girl walks out on stage*

Panda: Hey baby, how you doing? Starts to strip

X-pert: I'm fine baby thanks!

Panda: Ahhh dammit, not again! *runs off stage*

X-pert: Anyway...the winner of best mod/vip/vorn title is...Vornoff!, runner up is Luis.

  • X-pert sprouts wings and flies away*

Traptor: So the next award is for best sig and for best bio. Winner of best sig is Dillo and best bio is Threm. Runners up are vorn and blink.

Traptot: Next award is for Best Polls, and the winner is..

  • Traptor recieves a pass from Christ Bosh and takes the ball to the hole*bonus points to who gets that reference

Frog: Hmm, that was weird. Anyway, the winner is TPE, runner up is Traptor.

Frog: Moving right along, next award is for best topics..

DrJawn: Dude, you're about to hit your 10k posts!

Frog: Oh crap, you're right *disapeers for 7 months*

DrJawn: Hahaha sucker, so anyway, the winner for best topics is Escee, runner up is TPE.

DrJawn: Next award is for [Banned. - Link223]

Link223: Idiot. Winner of nicest user is April, runner up is Luis.

April: Thanks link! Just cause everyone else thinks you suck balls, doesn't mean i do! happy And since i'm so nice, i'll present the next award, for Most Generous. The winner is Zeldahoolin, runner up is Threm.

  • Dillo runs on stage, grabs april, and runs off*

Scott: Hey Mates, next award is for Most Improved, so which of you dole bludgers finally jumped up and stopped being such a damn galah? The winner is Lilb, runner up is Dillo. Congrats to you two, but i see mongrel headed for some white pointers, better grab my diggerydoo and get to work.

Mr. Hero: So what am i doing up here? What presenting the awards for weirdest user and silliest user? What's an award? Read the card? what card? Oh, this thing, ok. Uh, Escee wins both, teh_tingulator is runner up on both. Who they hell are those two? Since when do they post here? I'm so lost.

  • Mr. Hero walks aimlessly off the stage*
    Best mark up user is Dillo, runner up is escee
    Msamuleman: *In High pitched Voice* Hi Guys! The next award is for funniest user, the winner is UnanimousPrime runner up is escee. Congrats guys!
  • The sound of two things dropping echoes throughout the room*

Msamuleman: *Runs off stage* MOM, GUESS WHAT?!!! IT FINALLY HAPPENED!!!

TPE: WTF, i'm damn important, why was i not presenting a better award? And to top it off, this Japanese girl i've been stalking got a restraining order against me. Man, guess i'm gonna have to settle for stalking the korean again. Man, this sucks. *Opens envelope* WTF...biggest whiner..is me? When do i ever whine? Runner up is Vorn? Man that jerk whines way more then me...man this is stupid. Screw this you guys, i'm going to masturbate to a kleenex my japanese teacher used.

HHLink: Hmm, why am i presenting? do i have a gimmick? hmm...my gimmick will be presenting 2 awards at once. And no, it's not a cheap cop out of making a thing for each award...i swear. Most Overrated and Most Underrated winners are Traptor and Mitchman, runners up are Mario2 and DrJawn.
Random Invisitexted Award Biggest Attention whore is TPE, runner up is Adidas
Threm: Alright guys, so i'm gonna do the next two awards for Hottest Male and Hottest Female. The winner for hottest male is Solar, and runner is up Vornoff. And the winner for..

Andrea: James you stupid jackass, get off the computer and come change your daughters diaper. You are a terrible father!

Threm: Oh crap...i gotta go *Throws crap into the audience and runs off

Jamie: It's ok guys, i'll present the award for hottest female, The winner is Liz and runner up is April.

Liz: Did you vote for me Jamie?

Jamie: You know i did baby

  • Cue Poeroi CRM nowo Music*
  • Escee Beams down and Touches a corpse and beems away

Luis: I HAVE BEEN REBORN! BOW DOWN TO ME, YOUR MOD, YOUR GOD, YOUR RULER! NO ONE WILL EVER DO ANYTHING AGAIN! NO POSTS, NO TOPICS, NOTHING! BANS FOR EVERYONE!!!!!

  • Liz and Jamie continue to make out*

Luis: THERE WILL BE NONE OF THAT HERE! YOU TWO HAVE DESECRATED THE HOUSE OF LUIS! LET ALL SEE MY POWER AND TREMBLE!

  • Cock Fires*
  • Luis drops dead to the ground in a pile of semen*

Vornoff: And she was like owwwwwwwwww shut up luis!

Jamie and Liz: Our Hero!

Vornoff: All in a days work ladies, all in a days work. Now, shall we?

  • Cue Poeroi CRM nowo Music*

KCD: Well, that was strange. I'm here to present the awards for Best Name and Best AIM/MSN Name. Which is strange, since statistically speaking, i should only be presenting one award. Well let me explain it in an easier way for you all.


See? Quite simple. Winners are AG and Vornoff, runners up are Conapple and TPE.

  • A ninja appears behind the podium*

Ninja: The winner for Best and Worst Taste in Music is AG for best and Vornoff for Worst. Runner ups are escee and ag. *Sniff Sniff* Is that babies i smell? MMM...

  • The Ninja throws a smoke bomb and disapeers

Thebigxer: So since i work at bioware, i know what is awesome and what sucks. And the following award is the GTFO award, and the winner, Adidas really sucks and really needs to gtfo, the runner up sucks a whole lot too, so foxhaze, you can gtfo too.

Baller: So i'm here to present the Please come back award. And i'll have that award ready for you guys right away i promise.

Yoshidude: Hmm...I don't think he's coming back...Anyway, the winner is Cengah and the runner up is azntiger.

Yoshidude: The next two awards are for Best Male and Best Female and the winners are, AH..my dradle! ITS SPINNING AWAY! *runs off chasing the dradle*.

Mitchman: The winners for those two awards are Threm and Liz. Runner ups are escee and jamie. Calgary Flames Suck.
Ok, so maybe i'm running out of ideas, and i'm lazy, but trust me, it would of been another month if i didn't get lazy for a couple of them. Best Gamer is Ray with thebigxer as runner up, and mgoblue narrowly beat out tpe for best mgoblue. Ya ya, i know, i'm lazy.
Rayhovite: Strange i'm being used again, anyway...The winner for Best Veteran is Threm, Runner up is Mario2

Rayhovite: The winner for Worst Overall User is

Evan: STAIND SUCKS BITCH

Rayhovite: OH NO YOU DIDNT!

AG: RUN EVAN!! RUN!!! Oh, and no surprise, winner is Adidas runner up is foxhaze. Now i'm outta here, indy4life.

Adidas: As i present the award for Best Overall User I would say that, you know, we are a little bit out of touch here at the GCB every once in a while. I think it's probably a good thing. We're the ones who talk about thusdayton when it was just being whispered, and we talked about the wii when it wasn't really popular. And we, you know, we bring up subjects. This community, this group of people, gave TPE an GCB award in 2002 when the lame were still sitting in the backs of theaters. I'm proud to be a part of this board. Proud to be part of this community, and proud to be out of touch. And without further ado, the winner, of Best Overall User, is Threm. Runner up is Escee.


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